To begin your journey to parenthood through foster care, contact us today! Learn more here.

The post Journey to Parenthood first appeared on Lutheran Family and Children's Services of Missouri.

Jeremiah’s Story

At only 8-years old, Jeremiah had been exposed to too much. His parents, although loving, put their addiction before his safety and regularly abused drugs in his presence. When both his mom and dad were arrested and incarcerated on drug charges, Jeremiah was placed in foster care.

The separation devastated Jeremiah’s mother. She was disappointed in herself and knew she had to make better choices in the future. She vowed to follow her written service agreement so that she could be reunited with her son as soon as possible.

Meanwhile, Jeremiah adjusted to the new normal of living with his foster family. Rules, boundaries and routines were set for him. He thrived.

As months passed, Jeremiah’s foster mom and mother formed a great relationship. They bonded over shared photos, stories and hopes for the future for Jeremiah. Soon it was time for him to make the transition home.

The foster parents hosted a party for Jeremiah and his mom and asked the guests to help send him home by bringing one of his favorite snacks. It was a small way for all the people who had grown to love Jeremiah to show they cared. It also helped his mom fill the pantry with the things her son loved.

Jeremiah’s father returned home soon after the reunification. He formed a bond with Jeremiah’s foster parents as well; grateful his son received such unconditional love and guidance from total strangers.

Together, the two sets of parents continue to communicate and Jeremiah even spends a few weekends with his foster family when his parents have to work. They are a family – helping each other to give Jeremiah a great childhood.

The post Promise of Family through Reunification first appeared on Lutheran Family and Children's Services of Missouri.

Joel’s history teacher was concerned. In recent months, he had missed days of school and when he was in class, Joel seemed on edge and disinterested in classroom activities. The previous semester, Joel had been very engaged and had even shared his hopes to attend college to study ancient history. “What happened?” Joel’s teacher thought.

The school counselor was notified and after a conference call with Joel’s father, they all agreed Joel needed to talk to someone. The school counselor recommended Lutheran Family and Children’s Services (LFCS) in addition to regular meetings at school.

Joel began meeting with his LFCS therapist weekly. As their relationship developed, his therapist discovered that Joel’s behavior-changes began when he learned about his father’s drug use and criminal activities. This knowledge overwhelmed Joel with fear and anxiety.

A hotline call was made, and following an investigation, Joel’s father was arrested. His grandparents welcomed him into their home, providing Joel with stability and safety he hadn’t felt in nearly a year.  With prescribed mediation and the implementation of communication and coping skills he learned in counseling, Joel’s anxiety and depression were under control.  He soon began to flourish in his new school and environment.

Now 16 years old and driving, Joel feels like he is right where he needs to be.  He passed all of his classes last year and is starting to look at nearby colleges.

The post Promise of Childhood first appeared on Lutheran Family and Children's Services of Missouri.

Patrice was told of Bentley’s experience and injuries and she knew she could help. As a foster parent for more than 20 years, she had cared for children with special needs before. Bentley was placed in her care and his journey to recovery began.

Patrice refused to accept the doctors’ predictions. She found therapies to address his delays and spent countless hours addressing his needs. In just two years, Bentley made huge strides. He was able to sit up on his own, was learning to communicate and could even smile when he was happy. It was time for him to have a forever home.

A family interested in adopting through foster care had been working with LFCS and was told about Bentley. They agreed to meet with him and Patrice. They fell in love with this sweet little boy and soon made plans to adopt him.

Although forever scarred by the abuse, Bentley is now thriving because of the love he is shown.

Twice a year, LFCS provides Elevated Needs Training for foster parents. This and other available trainings prepare foster parents to care for children with special needs and, ultimately, reduce the risk of abuse. For questions about upcoming Foster Parent Training opportunities, contact Lisa.

The post Promise of Safety – Recovering from Abuse first appeared on Lutheran Family and Children's Services of Missouri.

The post Promise of Safety – Foster Care Reunification first appeared on Lutheran Family and Children's Services of Missouri.

April is National Child Abuse Prevention Month. At LFCS, we want to talk about this public health issue and what we can do to address it.

Here are just a few of the staggering statistics:

• One in 4 children experience some form of child abuse or neglect in their lifetimes.
• Thirty-two Missouri children died from abuse or neglect in 2017, 70% of whom were two years old or younger.
• Parents, stepparents or other primary caretakers account for the majority of perpetrators in child abuse and neglect cases.
• Poverty, on-going community violence, and weak connections between neighbors are related to a higher risk for child abuse and neglect
• The estimated average lifetime cost per victim of nonfatal child abuse and neglect was $210,012
• The total lifetime economic burden resulting from new cases of fatal and nonfatal child abuse and neglect is $124 billion

LFCS provides several areas of support to prevent child abuse and neglect as well as manages the social and behavioral ramifications of cases that were not prevented. We do so through our two pillars of service: Foster Care and Family Services & Behavioral Health and Community Prevention Services.

Foster Care and Family Services programs provide education to parents and care for children to decrease the risk of child abuse or neglect. Services include:

• Respite Foster Care
• Foster Care Case Management
• Pregnancy and Parenting Services
• Home Visitation

Behavioral Health and Community Prevention Services programs are available in 15 offices statewide on a sliding fee scale, as well as 60 schools in eight Districts across the St. Louis area. Services include:

• Counseling
• Child Psychiatry
• STEP-UP, a youth development program

If you find yourself in need of any of the above services, please contact LFCS. Together we can save children and families in Missouri.

April 6, 2018 is Wear Blue Day. Show your support and help spread awareness by wearing blue. Take a photo and share it on the social media with #GreatChildhoods and tag @LFCSMO.

The post Child Abuse Prevention Month 2018 first appeared on Lutheran Family and Children's Services of Missouri.

A hotline call notified Children’s Division that 8-year old twins, Jared and Bella, had repeatedly shown up to school with suspicious bruises. An investigation revealed the children, and their two younger siblings, suffered severe physical and verbal abuse at the hands of their mother and her boyfriend. The children endured daily beatings and were often locked in a room for hours, their wrists bound in duct tape. They had never been truly cared for or loved.

Finding the right home for Jared, Bella, Sam and Max was so important. They needed more than a place to sleep at night. Lynn, a single woman who had fostered many children before, knew she could care for them and welcomed the siblings into her home.

The first few weeks were not easy. Jared and Bella had severe PTSD and woke with night terrors regularly. Sam (5) was non-verbal and struggled with bed-wetting, and 20-month old Max was not walking and had severe health issues that his birth mother never addressed.

With the support of LFCS, Lynn could successfully address the needs of all four children. Jared, Bella and Sam started counseling. Max began medical treatment and physical therapy. Soon nights were less worrisome and days passed without incident.

Today, Jared and Bella are doing well and living with their father, Kyle. Lynn continues to care for Sam and Max. The family reunites weekly and Kyle hopes to have them all living together soon. Until then, he and Lynn revel in the innocence that has returned to the children’s eyes.

If you would like to help kids like Jared, Bella, Sam and Max consider making a gift to LFCS today. Your support makes the help they need readily available.

If you are interested in becoming a foster parent, learn more now.

The post A Promise to Care – Foster Care and Family Services first appeared on Lutheran Family and Children's Services of Missouri.

When we are young, we assume we will fall in love, get married, and children will follow. But starting a family is not always as easy as we might assume.  Adopting from foster care was not the path to parenthood Ericka and Brad expected, but then they met Destiny. The rest, as they say, is history.

There are thousands of Missouri children living in foster care and in need of a place to call home. If you are interested in providing a safe, loving environment for a child in need, contact LFCS Foster Care and Family Services today!

Can’t see the video above? Click here to watch it on YouTube.

The post A Promise of Love – Foster Care and Family Services first appeared on Lutheran Family and Children's Services of Missouri.

Did you know that there are approximately 400,000 children in foster care on any given day and that there are approximately 400,000 churches in the United States? That means that if every church in the United States took responsibility for just ONE foster child, the foster crisis would end. There would be no kids without families. There would be no kids sleeping in offices because the caseworker’s can’t find placement. There would be no child that feels unwanted, unlovable, or unworthy of a family.

Now what if I told you that this model of care was not an original idea and that it was, in fact, an ancient idea. What if I told you that this model of care was a Biblical mandate? James 1:27 says that caring for orphans and widows is the definition of religion in its purest form.

When we rely on the government to be the solution to a crisis that was designed to be the church’s responsibility, the system will remain broken. Until we can mobilize our churches to answer the call of foster care, we will never see change.

The beauty of this divine design is that a very small percentage of people actually have to be foster parents. However, the entire congregation needs to be involved in some way. Whether providing respite, helping with transportation, assisting with meal prep, financially supporting, or partnering in prayer, the congregational wraparound services are essential to the successful implementation of this Biblical re-work of foster care.

Although it is a lofty goal, if we fall short of our Biblical mandate, the church is not operating to its fullest potential. The body of Christ is essential to healing the spirits of the broken; the body of Christ is essential to the restoration of America’s modern day orphans; and it is the body of Christ that should be leading the charge in this full-on spiritual battle.

Can you join LFCS in conquering the foster care crisis? Click here to learn more.

The post Foster Care Crisis first appeared on Lutheran Family and Children's Services of Missouri.

Today was a tough one. One of those days when I question why we choose to foster kids. We have this sweet spot in life right now with our girls – they are young enough to always want to be with us yet big enough to be self sufficient in many ways – why muck it up with a toddler that doesn’t know us or our way of doing things? Enjoy the ride while it lasts, right?

A few days ago our social worker said that a little boy, Joel, who was in our care last fall and whom we adored needed care again for a few weeks. His mom specifically requested that he be placed with our family again because she knew he would be loved and well taken care of while she dealt with an emergency. We were all so thrilled that our sweet, little guy was coming back! I prepared myself that it had been six months and little people change drastically in that amount of time, but surely he would remember us when stepped inside our home. Didn’t quite turn out that way. He was scared to death of our dog Mr. Biggs and wouldn’t come inside. I put Biggs away and showed Joel pictures of he and Biggs as buddies last fall. Joel clearly didn’t understand. Turns out that was the least of my worries.

Apparently, turning 3 last month has catapulted this little dude into a raging, tumultuous tot. He’s learned to spit, kick, hit, bite, jump on the furniture, throw things and his second favorite word is NO. What’s his favorite word, you ask? His favorite word is BIT**. Yep, you read it correctly. I have never been called that name so many times in my life as I was today in six hours from the mouth of this little guy. He and I spent a whole lot of time in time-out today. Each time, I told him we don’t use that word in this house. I don’t call him mean names and he won’t call anyone in this house mean names. Each and every time he said it in that little toddler voice it made my blood boil. And then it didn’t. It made me sad. Very sad. Because the adults in his world talk to each other like this so much that he knew exactly when and how to use the word. To him, it’s what you say when you are angry. To him, this is normal. And maybe even more disheartening is that to his adults, this is normal.

As I was holding back tears tonight, feeling exhausted and wondering if this is really worth it, I walked by the front door. And there I saw it. And a smile slowly spread across my face. Hours ago, I asked Joel to put his shoes by the front door. (What I really meant was put your shoes with all of the other shoes on the shoe mat in the dining room which is close to the front door.) And he did…he put his shoes by the front door exactly the way he put his shoes by the front door last fall. And a bit of joy and even a little bit of laughter filled my heart.

We are sowing seeds of love and hope in each of these little people that we are blessed to know. And they do the same exact thing for us.

And tonight I really needed that simple reminder of exactly why we do what we do. #love #hope #fosterfamily

If you are interested in becoming a foster parent, click here!

The post Small Blessings first appeared on Lutheran Family and Children's Services of Missouri.